Rainy Red River Gorge Treehouse Elopement

Over the past couple of years, I've photographed more and more elopements— I absolutely love that they are becoming more popular! For Harry (he/him) and Sara (she/her), eloping was an easy decision. Sara said, "We joke that eloping is a family tradition. Harry's parents and grandparents eloped and my grandparents eloped, as well. Harry gets a kick out of telling people that we had as many people there as was legally necessary. We're also both incredibly awkward and the solitude of eloping allowed us the freedom to be our authentically weird selves without worrying about what others would think. I joke that we had to elope because we couldn't justify an eight-minute-long first dance to the classic "Get Low," which is what Harry was reciting when we would break out in funky moves."

"We were originally looking to elope in Europe, but you know, money. And covid. And time. Love is patient, but we are not. We could not wait to be husband and wife, so we decided to look at affordable alternatives that would allow us to push up the timeline while also honoring the safety precautions in place due to the pandemic. We decided that the Gorge might be a nifty option. Plus, I love the outdoors (hiking, running, kayaking, etc.) and Harry is big into fantasy. The Gorge seemed like the perfect backdrop to fit both those interests! I remembered seeing treehouses and cabins available to rent when researching potential staycations, so I checked availability, and the Looking Glass had a single upcoming date open: a random Thursday in April, two months away. So we went for it!"

In the afternoon on that random Thursday, we drove up a winding gravel road through hillsides covered in spring wildflowers, ferns, and lush trees to find the Looking Glass treehouses peeking out of the canopy above. Soon Sara, Harry, and their officiant Luke joined us and they unpacked the cars in the rain, taking turns holding umbrellas for each other. Sara put the finishing touches on their cakes and they danced while they helped each other get dressed. "Dancing goofily with Harry helped to ground me throughout the day and relieve stress. It's something silly we do (poorly) at home, in our kitchen, waiting for coffee, etc., so it helped me stay focused on him and us and just have fun."

Sara DIYed several things for the wedding— she painted the small "we eloped" sign based on a picture of Red River Gorge and made TWO wedding cakes. "Sara is a home baker and wanted to give it a go, which she mildly regrets because it was hella stressful to transport (and the kitchen still hasn't recovered)." One cake was "hers," and incorporated some of her favorite flavors, and the other was "his," including dragons (painted by Harry) hoarding their treasure! Inside Harry's cake were mini red velvet cookies— a throwback to the first time Sara and Harry ever met when he offered her a red velvet sandwich cookie and she was too aghast at him interrupting a conversation she was having with another patron to decline even though she hates red velvet.

"We also tried to honor our meeting place (Luke's Coffee) by bringing a beautiful pour-over and a bunch of our favorite coffee cups (how can one decide??). But SOMEONE forgot our coffee beans, leaving us with nothing but a bunch of empty mugs (and hearts). Luke, our extroverted hero, raced over to the next campsite to ask those cabin dwellers if they had any coffee to sacrifice to a newlywed couple. In awe, they gave him a bag, which was the perfect complement to our breakfast-for-dinner "reception for two" after."

"Our wedding is brought to you by etsy. We tried to support as many independent sellers as we could while throwing this shindig together in a matter of weeks." They included a glass ring box shaped like a D20, champagne flutes and cake servers that featured dragons, HP-themed pajamas, as well as vow books so they could display their personalized vows in their home after the wedding.

"My earrings were birds and Harry's tie bar was a fish. When I asked Harry for his last name while adding it to my contacts before we started dating, he blurted out, "FOGLE MEANS BIRD IN GERMAN," which was more information than I needed. I started calling him "Harry Bird" after that. My maiden name is "Fisher," so we decided to incorporate that into our wedding, as well. Interestingly, we were watching my favorite movie (Ever After). and noticed a quote in which Danielle asks Leonardo Da Vinci, "A bird may love a fish, signore, but where will they live?" and he responds, "Then I shall have to make you wings." Even more fascinating is that this same riddle is uttered in Harry's favorite musical— Fiddler on the Roof! We definitely did not take that as a sign... (We did. We did take it as a sign. We're cheesy like that.)"

"Our officiant was the impeccable Luke Gifford. He owned the coffee shop where we met— Harry worked as a barista and I frequented there during grad school to "work" (aka wonder when Harry would waltz in). Luke, his wife, and another member of the staff were waiting impatiently for us to get together. As Luke noted during his speech, he texted his wife the first time Harry sat down at my table excited that it was finally happening! Luke is a good friend to us both and we could not have imagined a better person to marry us!"

"Our flowers came from Jeanie Gorrell Floral Designs— she did a fabulous job capturing the wildflower, bohemian, woodland fairy vibe I was after. I wasn't super particular about which flowers were included with the exception of delphinium. Harry's nanny's name is Delphia, but because we were eloping, she wouldn't be present. We still wanted to honor her in some way... plus, the pops of blue were gorgeous!"

Venue: Looking Glass Treehouse through Canopy Crew // Officiant: Luke Gifford // Photography: Sarah Katherine Davis // Videography: Joyce Barbour // Dress: Maggie Sottero via High Vibe Bride on Poshmark // Florals: Jeanie Gorrell Floral Designs // Sara's Boots & Socks: Dillards // Hair Piece: David's Bridal // Engagement Ring: Joe Rosenberg // Earrings: VRjewels on Etsy // Sara's Band: LoveRingDesign on Etsy // Vest, Pants, & Shirt: Murano // Harry's Boots: Steve Madden // Tie: The Tie Bar // Tiebar & Harry's Band: TheRomanVintageShop // Vow Books: StudioTenebris on Etsy // Glass Ring Box: GLASSOBJECTSstore on Etsy // Dragon Ring Box: DRATAR on Etsy // Hangers: TheReadheadDesignShop on Etsy // Champagne Flutes, Cake Knife & Serve: FellowshipFoundry // PJ Bottoms: BridalPartyRobeShop on Etsy // Sweatshirts: MyPartyTees on Etsy // Gum Paste Flowers: SugarFlowersByShaile on Etsy // Moth: SweetpeaSugarArt on Etsy // Ladybug Sprinkles: SweetSugarPearl on Etsy // Cake Topper: designLeeStudio // Candy Crystals: sweetniks

How To Better Serve LGBTQ+ Couples: A Guide For Wedding Vendors

The wedding industry is getting more inclusive, but we still have a *lot* of work to do. Here’s a great starting point for wedding vendors on how to better serve LGBTQ+ couples.

Clearly say what you stand for on your website. 

• If you have space to talk about loving pizza, coffee, and houseplants you have space for an anti-discrimination statement.

• Couples should never have to email you to ask if you’re inclusive.

• If you feel hesitant to post that you are LGBTQ-friendly, you need to ask yourself why that is.

Use gender-neutral language on your website, contracts, and when working with clients.

• Not all couples have a bride. Not all brides are the ones leading wedding planning.

• Queer couples shouldn’t have to read bride & groom over and over again on your website or in your contract.

• You don’t know if there are non-binary folks on the guest list. When speaking with the wedding party call them that or say “Sarah’s side” if you need to be more specific.

• “Esteemed guests” works much better than “ladies and gentlemen” when making announcements.

Respect Pronouns.

• Include your pronouns in your bio and email signature. This is not only a way to let folks know you will respect their pronouns, but it's also a nice way of normalizing everyone sharing their pronouns. The burden shouldn’t fall on those using they/them, xe/xem, or trans folks. Pronouns shouldn’t be assumed.

• Ask couples their pronouns when they inquire with you and then always use those pronouns. This is great to include your contact form!

• Pronouns are also an indicator of what other language might work for someone. If a client is using they/them pronouns, even if they look very feminine or masculine to you, they likely won’t want other gendered language applied to them. Instead of bride or groom, you can say marrier. Instead of husband or wife, you can say, spouse or partner. This is a great habit to get into regardless of your client's gender identity!

Don’t assume things about your clients or their guests.

• Even if your couple looks straight to you—you don’t know their gender or sexual identity, nor do you know their guests’. 

• Ask your couple what they want! Queer or straight, lots of couples don’t want to participate in various traditions. Give couples the freedom to make their own choices & to make their wedding a reflection of their love.

• For photographers, don’t assume someone’s role in a relationship and then pose them that way. Pay attention to how your couple interacts with each other and use that to inform posing and prompts. 

• When discussing getting ready or fashion choices you can refer to someone’s outfit rather than “the dress” since all kinds of couples wear all kinds of different things.

• You can ask if someone will be including flowers in their look rather than assuming they will have a boutonniere or bouquet.

• When ending the ceremony, the officiant can say something like I pronounce you “legally wed” or “married” or “partners for life” instead of any gender-specific phrase.

• The officiant can also say “you may now share a kiss” or “I invite you to seal your promise with a kiss” instead of “kiss the bride.”

Advocate for LGBTQ folks outside of the wedding industry. 

• It is not enough to be “okay” with taking someone’s money.

• You should be working to improve the everyday lives of queer folks by staying informed, signing petitions, writing your representatives, and sharing content to help others get involved as well.

• If you're able, donate to organizations like the Marsha P. Johnson Institute, The Trevor Project, or locally at Louisville Youth Group.

Commit to Learning.

• Queer Kentucky has a training called "Trans Inclusivity in the Workplace" that is great info for all work environments.

• Inclusive Kentucky Weddings expands on this post in their guide for LGBTQ+ friendly wedding vendors, offers an LGBTQ+ audit for wedding professionals, and has a directory full of Queer-positive wedding vendors!

• Listen to LGBTQ+ folks when we share our experiences.

Last but definitely not least; Don’t tokenize people. 

• This would be a whole post of its own. Read “People Are Not Props/How to Avoid Tokenism in Your Portfolio” from Catalyst before working to diversify your portfolio.

Parklands Winter Engagement Session

When imagining what month you’d like to plan your engagement session, what season comes to mind? I’m guessing sometime in the spring, summer, or fall...but I’m here to tell you not to sleep on winter engagement sessions. Winter brings many unique opportunities that just aren’t possible in other seasons, so today I’ll be sharing some of my favorite winter benefits as well as dispelling some myths I hear a lot about winter engagement sessions!

Myth: Everything looks dead and brown in the winter.

A lot of people think that if you’re planning a winter engagement session you need to have snow for it to look good. While snow is really pretty, it’s absolutely not necessary for a winter session! For Tobie & Kendall, I chose an area I knew had tall warm grasses, bold evergreens, a pond with good reflections, and some rolling hills— all of these elements came together to bring more color and contrast to their images!

Myth: You can’t stay warm and look nice at the same time.

Tobie and Kendall got lucky with a fifty-degree day in January so they didn’t need to worry too much about the cold. However, they brought a blanket that they were able to not only use to sit down, but also to wrap up and snuggle in as it got more chilly. If you have a colder day for your session, you can wear lots of layers to keep yourself warm and to make the images feel more cozy! Hand warmers in your pockets or toe warmers in your shoes can also make you more comfortable. One final tip is to bring a hot beverage to sip in the car between locations or you can even bring a cute thermos to include it in images to make them feel more date-like.

Benefit: You won’t get sweaty.

This one is kind of a no-brainer, but Kentucky summers can be somewhat brutal with the heat and humidity. If suffering through warm temps while trying not to look sweaty in photos doesn’t sound difficult enough imagine doing that while also trying to snuggle with each other. In the winter you can skip being sweaty and you’ll actually WANT to snuggle up to stay warm.

Benefit: Fewer people around means more privacy.

I schedule almost all of my engagement sessions Monday through Thursday— largely because I usually have weddings on the weekend, but also to avoid crowds. In the winter, there are always fewer people out so places that are usually pretty busy end up being nearly empty. This is great for two reasons. One, we don’t have to avoid people in the background of your images, and two, you don’t have to worry about people watching you all and feeling self-conscious.